RvB Loops
by GammaTron
Summary: Part of the Infinite Time Loops. The Anchor is Michael J. Caboose. ...This will not end well for anyone.
1. Chapter 1

**GammaTron: Hey. Guess you know what this means. I am now writing stories for this series of continuous loops. If you want to understand better, check TV Tropes for Infinite Time Loops. I own no one.**

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><p>1.1 (GammaTron)<p>

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><p>Michael J. Caboose had trouble with a lot of things when it came to thinking. But there were times he was quite brilliant. Right now, this was the fiftieth time he's just blown up his best friend Leonard Church in the same exact way as he did the first time. He wasn't sure when it had started, but time seemed to have gone broke and always seemed to end when they just sent a letter to this meanie pants who was using two freelancers to make a whole planet go through a civil war for stuff on the planet and then begin around the time he got off the bird to come to Blood Gulch. ...Did the circle get a bite out of it?<p>

"You just shot Church, you team-killing fucktard!"

"Tucker did it!" Caboose quickly responded.

"I'm Tucker, you idiot!"

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><p>1.2 (Evilhumour)<p>

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><p>"Twilight?"<p>

"Yes Rarity?"

"Why are we here?"

"That seems to be one of life's greatest mysteries."

"Simmons," Sarge stated.

"Yes, sir?" Private Simmons asked.

"Did ya notice anythin'...unusual...'bout Private Spike t'day?" Sarge asked.

"Aside from him actually doing something instead of trying to be lazy?" Simmons asked as the two watched the purple and green soldier mopping the floor.

"...Ah'm jest...Ah'm jest gonna call it quits fer t'day," Sarge informed as he turned to go to the resting quarters of the base, "This is too much fer me t' think about."

"Agreed," Simmons nodded as he followed.

"...What's with them?" Spike asked as he looked over at the bronze soldier, "It's like I've never done a thing in my life until just now to them."

"Si."

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><p>1.3 (GammaTron)<p>

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><p>Now Caboose was starting to get angry. And he forgot how to get angry back before this started up. He lost track (he never could count higher than two) of how many times he had tried to not have Church go away with the Emp. He tried knocking him out and he ended up on Agent Washingtub's shoulder. He thought he convinced Church he'd go instead of him once and Church still came! It was like something wanted Church to not live anymore! This time...He had a perfect plan.<p>

"Hey, Church!" *click*

"Huh?" *bang* _"Caboose!"_

"Tucker did it!" Caboose called as he pushed Agent Washington out as fast as he could before Church could try to go into them through their radios.

A few days later, Caboose ended up getting early parole from jail when he (not on purpose) killed all the other prisoners except for Agent Washington. ...It wasn't his fault. They stabbed themselves in their backs with his spoon.

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><p>1.5 (GammaTron)<p>

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><p>Okay. Church was officially confused now. He knew the Emp went off and he felt this quick pain and then nothing. And now, he was walking through a hall in the old Blue Base at Blood Gulch. It was then Tucker ran up to him…in his old standard issue Blue armor?<p>

"Dude, can I please hold the sniper rifle?" Tucker begged.

"The hell? Dude, no. And what happened to your armor?"

"What are you talking about? This _is_ my armor. Though, I do want to get a new one soon," Tucker noted.

What? Minutes later, Church was experiencing seeing a dead Captain Butch Flowers all over again. A bit after that, Caboose showed up with Sheila. He wouldn't get killed this time by her.

_"Son of a bitch!"_ Church cursed himself as he looked at his dead body…again, _"The hell is with this shit?!"_

"Dude, I can tell you right now the best guy to talk to about this is to Caboose," Future Church informed.

_"Seriously?!"_ Church demanded.

"Yeah. Surprised me, too," Future Church shrugged before he went off.

_"Ugh!"_ Church groaned out in annoyance.

_"Okay, Caboose, what the fuck is going on here?"_ Church demanded, managing to convince Tucker to go away for a minute.

"What do you mean?"

_"Last thing I remember before waking up here in Blood Gulch was the Emp going off when we were dealing with the Meta!"_

"Church!" Caboose cheered as he tried to hug him, "You remember now! Oh, I am so happy!"

_"Caboose, focus! What is going on here?"_

"I am not sure," Caboose replied, "I started going in loops in time for a long time now. I know that it is more than two, though. And you kept dying when the Emp went off. But then you came back as a new AI and we fought a lot of copies of Texas and won and…"

_"Okay, okay, okay. Hold on, Caboose,"_ Church waved his hands at him to stop the guy from talking, _"I _died_ and came back to life?"_

"Yes."

Church sighed, _"Great. Well, once we get to meet Delta again, let's talk to him. He'll make better sense that you're making right now."_

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><p>1.6 ( wildrook, slightly edited by GammaTron)<p>

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><p>"Hey," the maroon soldier said to the orange one.<p>

"Yeah..." the orange one replied, a little unsure about himself.

"You ever wonder why we're here?"

Unknown to the maroon one, this time he IS wondering why he's here. The last thing he remembered was the incident in Chorus where they exposed the fake war, and they were preparing for war. Next thing he knew, he found himself back in the hellhole known as Blood Gulch. As a reject of Project Freelancer and more or less Target Practice.

"Well, probably because we're selected for something big," Grif replied. "Or we're just here to just waste time on this 'war.' I mean, my Sister's about to show up, but on the opposite side."

"Wait, what?" Simmons asked him. "Your sister's a Blue? We have to tell Sarge!"

"No, don't," Grif replied, hesitantly. "I just got the message, and she thinks she's a Red. She's colorblind, and I need you to NOT tell Sarge about this. At all. He hates me regardless, so he wouldn't use her as a Red Spy. She's...not exactly that smart."

"How is that possible?" Simmons asked him. "Actually, you know what, never mind. I won't tell Sarge, but only because it would just look bad for the rest of us. But...this can't stay under for long."

"I know, which is why when she gets here, I'm going with the Blues to play Prisoner. Just...don't tell Sarge, Lopez, or the newbie showing up."

On the ridge, a cobalt and teal soldier were watching...but the cobalt one was surprised at the orange one.

"What are they doing?" the teal one asked him.

Normally, he'd be upset at Tucker at this point, but this...it was a new development. "Talking about family back home," he said. "Usually, that gets them killed. I knew this one guy in Sidewinder that got murdered as soon as he mentioned his fiancee, but I think we might have a replacement for Captain Flowers if the orange one's nervousness is correct."

"Oh yeah, didn't they tell us how long the trip is?"

"Maybe a couple years, give or take. Right now, find something to arm yourself with. The rookie might be in the tank already."

Tucker rolled his eyes. "Great," he muttered. "I just hope the rookie doesn't screw this up."

_'You and me both,'_ Church thought.

As soon as Tucker was gone, Church had radioed Grif's channel.

"What the..." Grif muttered.

"Oi, Orange Guy," Church said. "What's the last thing you remember?"

"Church? You're here? The last thing I remember was stopping the war at Chorus, and now I'm back where Simmons is a Kiss-Ass, Sarge is a Blue-Hater, and Lopez doesn't speak with Donut arriving in a few minutes."

"I'm usually on the ledge with Tucker. Right now, we're planning an attack just to get you to me and Caboose. I'll explain what's going on later, but I have to warn you, Friendly Fire's not going to be on with Sheila, so I might have the body I have blown up. Just remember, Memory is the Key."

"Memory is the key," Grif replied. "Wait...Epsilon?"

"In a way. Now don't move. They don't know how much of a lousy shot I am."

With that, he fired at the Red Base, hoping Tucker and Caboose heard them.

Later, in the secret cave...

"Okay, you have my attention," Grif said, "but really, time is in a circle?"

"In a Loop," Church replied. "Caboose is just being his usual self."

"I didn't know you cared," Caboose said.

"I usually don't, but I'm just grateful that I'm the first one to Awaken, and mostly in Blood Gulch. I really don't want to experience fragmentation..."

Caboose got the idea as Grif sighed. "So, you know about my plan to get my Sister to your base?" he asked Church.

"Oh yeah," he replied. "And it took a while to get used to, but I made it to Epsilon and I remember everything. It might take a while for the others to show up."

"The Red Guy's back to before I befriended him," Caboose replied. "I wish he were involved."

Sad part was, Grif and Church would agree that if Sarge were Looping, he'd at least tone down the Blue Hunt. But it could have been at any moment. And it would be EONS before Washington, Tex, and Carolina would Loop.

"So, what are we going to do about Wyoming, O'Malley, and The Meta?" Grif asked him. "I feel kind of naked without the Grif Shot."

"Well, considering Plans and I never go hand in hand," Church said, "And I have to force Caboose to get angry, we have to wing it most of the time. Besides, I can handle some of the equipment hidden within your suits and Caboose's MK V can resist emergency shut-downs."

"I just have to remember to wake you guys up," Caboose replied. "But what about Tex?"

Church gave Caboose a look. "I know, I know," he said. "I may have moved on, but I haven't forgotten. If it's possible to save her from the Director before the battle, I'll take that chance, but right now, we go Baseline. As in we do the same thing until Doc shows up. Besides, O'Malley won't know what hit him when he gets into your head."

Despite everything, Church was in AI form...but he had seen the inside of Caboose's head. For one, the Reds were more accurate, and there were at least TWO Churches...in case one dies.

It was hard to explain to Tex, but that was another matter entirely. If O'Malley's there, Church would have to assimilate the mad AI into his own system one baby step at a time.

But with Grif looping, their chances have slightly increased. They were still outright screwed, but it was only a matter of time before the Reds and Blues work together once more. Because if they were going to survive the Loops, they might have to pick up a few tricks.

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><p>1.8 (GammaTron)<p>

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><p>"Attack!" Sarge roared as he charged at the Blue Base…only to skid to a halt.<p>

"Oh, hey there," Church waved, his ruby armor shining in the eternal sunlight.

"Uh…What?"

"Dudes, what took you so long?" Tucker asked as he walked over in a dark red armor, "We already took out the Blues here and got their flag."

"We won!" Caboose cheered…still in his blue armor.

"Dammit, Caboose!" Church shouted, "Why are you wearing that? We told you to go put your standard red armor back on!"

"But this armor is awesome! It has cup holders!"

"Does this mean the war is over and we can go home now?" Grif asked, laughing inside his head, _'This is the best mess with Sarge plan ever…of all time.'_

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><p>1.9 (GammaTron, Evilhumor)<p>

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><p>Big Mac finished wiping a glass. From what he could tell, he and Rainbow Dash were the only ones Awaken for the loop, meaning there was a Hidden Anchor. He looked up form his cleaning at the sound of the doors slamming open. A pair of blue ponies and an orange, somewhat fat, pony with them. He was able to make out the Greek symbol for Alpha on the cobalt unicorn, an Oreo over a bed on the orange pegasus, and...he couldn't make out the standard blue unicorn's Cutie Mark.<p>

"Seriously, why the fuck are we little horses?" the cobalt unicorn demanded.

"Who cares? That rainbow chick said there was booze here and I want to get something that'll make me unresponsive for the rest of this weird experience," the orange pegasus snorted.

"This is the bestest thing I have ever experienced!" the blue unicorn cheered.

"Shut up, Caboose!" the other two groaned as if it were something normal.

"What can I get you three?" Big Mac asked as they stopped before the bar.

"What's the best damn shit that'll knock us out or kill Caboose here so this issue we're having with crashes?" the cobalt unicorn asked.

"Yay! I get to hang out with Lin again!" Caboose cheered.

"Seriously, what the fuck was with that?" the orange one asked, "We were teens, going to a school with busty teenagers, and Caboose ends up getting engaged to the only girl there that is as strong as him."

"Eiken, I suppose?" Big Mac asked.

"That school. Got anything that'll get that out of my head too?" the orange pegasus asked.

"Eenope. Haven't managed to figure out the right kind of drink to get rid of that particular memory. So how long have you been in the loop?" Big Mac asked.

"Again with that? What the hell do you mean by it?" the unicorn groaned.

"Church, I am telling you. We are going in circles in time! That is why you are alive!" Caboose informed his fellow unicorn.

"Oh my god! Shut the fuck up, Caboose!" the unicorn groaned.

"So this is the first time you've been like this?" Big Mac asked.

"Nah. One time we ended up stuck on an island of vikings and Caboose ended up being the son of a viking chief and got this cool dragon to ride on," the orange pegasus shrugged.

"So you've never talked to anyone else about this?" Big Mac asked as he pushed the cup to him.

"Not our problem," the orange pegasus shrugged before taking a deep drink of it, "Ah. Booze, how I missed you. I had to go two years without this stuff at that Eiken shit."

Big Mac sighed as he began to get out the supplies. Looks like he would be the one who had to give the presentation. He flinched when he heard one of his cups shatter.

"Caboose!" Church shouted.

"Tucker did it!"

"TUCKER ISN'T EVEN HERE!" Church yelled.


	2. Chapter 2

**Okay, everyone, just a reminder of what this is about since I forgot to mention it in the first chapter:**

**Loop mechanics (general):**

**One person in a Loop, often the main character, is an Anchor. They are the person who first starts time looping.**

**There is always at least one Anchor present in a given Time Loop snippet, though it may not be the local one.**

**The standard pattern for a loop is that the Anchor (and whoever else is Looping there) come to awareness in a loop at a particular point in the story. From there, events will play out as influenced by the Loopers present, acting with the benefit of their foreknowledge, until either a predetermined end point is reached or all the Loopers have copped it.**

**To be Awake is to be aware of the time loops (that is, to have gone back in time this time.)**

**The Anchor is the only character guaranteed to be Awake. Even after others have started looping, it is mostly random as to whether they will be Awake this particular loop.**

**Crossovers, fusions, and alternate pasts can also take place. It is perfectly possible, for example, to have the characters Awaken into a loop which conforms to a fanfic universe rather than reality.**

**Loops do not have to be in chronological order, but it is strongly preferred that they not require a mutually contradictory order (where A must be before B and B must be before A.)**

**Just about every Looper is very, very stir crazy.**

**Loop mechanics (specific):**

**Caboose is the Anchor.**

**RVBverse Loopers are known as the 'Idiots' of the Loops by some, 'Lucky B_tards' by others, and 'the Pitied' by the rest because of their Anchor.**

**I assume that the Red VS Blue series is around ten years from Project Freelancer's beginning to the declaration of war against Charon Industries by the Reds and Blues, though it may start to expand once the next season comes out.**

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><p><strong>2.1 (GammaTron)<strong>

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><p>"Hey, Simmons?"<p>

"What is it, Grif?"

"Can you look up Sarge? I want to see what his actual name is," Grif asked.

"What?! No! I'm trying to find all the Blues in the system!" Simmons argued.

"Please?"

"Fine," Simmons sighed as he quickly brought it up, "Wait, what? Sarge, is your name actually 'Sargent S. Sargent?'"

"Yep. Ah had mah name legally changed before signing up for the military!" Sarge informed.

"So, wait, you actually changed your name to the rank you currently have?"

"Exactly! Ah knew that it was mah goal t' be a Sargent!" Sarge informed.

"Wow. And I thought you had a big enough ego before," Grif sweatdropped, "Hey, Simmons? Yeah, change his name to 'Sarge General.'"

"Okay. Wait, what?" Simmons looked at Grif.

"Well, I think he's going to be promoted in a year or so," Grif noted.

"Really now?" Sarge asked.

"Well, you have been a good example," Grif noted as he pointed at Simmons, "You've got a loyal soldier at all times, for one. And you made Lopez, something I don't think anyone else could do."

Sarge stammered and tried to come up with something. Simmons, meanwhile, thought Grif had grown a second head that shouted Russian. Nearby, Caboose smiled a little in his worry about Church and Agent Washington.

"Who are you and what have ya done wit' mah soldier?" Sarge finally demanded.

"Look, during my time as a Sargent, I started to think at night about, well, everything you did in Blood Gulch," Grif shrugged, "Sure, I got bored near the end which is why we ended up about to be shot when you arrived, but you really are a great guy, Sarge. If we don't make it out of this, then I just wanted you to know that I think you could've been a General."

"…" Sarge turned to Simmons, "Simmons, initiate plan 'Change mah name ta Sargent General!'"

"Yes sir!" Simmons saluted before they both shot Grif and then changed Sarge's name to that.

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><p><strong>2.2 (GammaTron)<strong>

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><p>"Grif?"<p>

"Huh?" Grif turned to see Lopez walk up to him, "Hey, Lopez."

"¿Por qué estamos aquí? Mis datos dice que estamos de vuelta en el tiempo (Why are we here? My data says that we're back in time)," Lopez pondered.

"Huh? Hold on," Grif turned around and walked around a corner before coming back with a book, "Okay. What did you say again?" Lopez repeated himself, "Huh…Okay…" he nearly dropped it, "Wait. You're looping now?"

"Bucle (Looping)?"

"Hold on. Big Mac gave me a copy of the material," Grif informed as he reached behind his back and pulled out a small book with a magenta star with six smaller ones circling it, "Here you go. All you need to know."

Lopez quickly leafed through it before handing it back to Grif, "…Cuando veo esto Sakura Haruno, voy a terminar con su rápida y fácil?"

Grif leafed through his book, "Whoa…! Yeah…I don't think that's a good idea."

"Considéralo como mi manera de decirle 'joder conmigo, me cojo con usted.'"

"…You, sir, are a badass."

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><p><strong>2.3 (GammaTron)<strong>

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><p>"Potter, Lopez."<p>

Now Ron knew something was up with the Loop. He thought Harry was just taking a Vacation Loop when he didn't see him on the train. He and Hermoine watched as a boy with bronze-colored hair, somewhat tan skin, and a blank face marched up to the Sorting Hat and sat down. The moment the Sorting Hat was put on his head, the hat let out a girlish scream of fright and fell off his head, foaming from the hole. Lopez Potter merely stood up, walked over to the Gryffindor Table, and sat down.

"…Que (What)?" Lopez demanded at the looks he was getting.

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><p><strong>2.4 (wildrook)<strong>

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><p>Issei groaned as he looked at the bartender.<p>

"Going to need a big one," he said. "Ugh, after that Loop, I'm going to lay off Oppai for two loops."

(You can't be serious,) Ddraig replied.

Hell, Issei Hyoudou, rumored to surpass Jiraiya in perversion, said he would lay off his usual past-time.

"Did I just hear something crazy, Saito?" Louise asked him, nearby.

Saito groaned. "Must have been a bad loop," he muttered. "Yo, Issei!"

Issei was surprised. "Hiraga. Louise," he said. "Didn't think you guys were here. You would not believe what happened to me."

"Punishment Loop," they both said.

Issei groaned. "In my defense, Vali forced my hand," he said.

"You get Eiken?" Saito asked him.

"Worse." That caught their attention. "And this is even with just being human."

"What happened that's worse than Eiken?" Louise inquired. "The one with the Wagtails?"

Issei gave them a look. "I was in School Days," he said. "As the womanizer. Seriously, I looked into my Loop Memories. Guy already made someone pregnant and wasn't exactly ready for the consequences of being a teenage father, regardless of how the Loops work. And when Kotohana found out about Sekai, my throat was slit and I was on a boat."

There were some fates not even the worst of Tsunderes can wish on a pervert. Louise cringed when she heard that.

"Damn," Saito muttered.

"I know," Issei replied, in grief.

Louise then groaned. "Pray that world doesn't loop," she replied. "Wasn't his name Makoto Itou?"

"Unfortunately," Saito muttered. "And I take it not even you would wish that fate?"

"I may have been a brat in baseline, but I'm not completely heartless. That...and I've heard rumors about it."

Well, Issei didn't think Koneko could sense his grief. He REALLY has to get her to learn Senjutsu from Jiraiya when she's Awake.

"So, what happened to you guys?" Issei asked them.

"Blood Gulch," Louise and Saito muttered.

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><p><strong>2.5 (GammaTron) Fused Pokémon Loop Part 1:<strong>

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><p>"So let me get this straight: the guy you normally travel with is named 'Ash,' right?" Church asked.<p>

"Yep. Right about now is when he ends up hitting a Spearow on the head with a rock and we get to running away in a Baseline Loop," Pikachu shrugged.

"Why do you run away?" Church asked.

"Because that one Spearow summons the whole flock in this area," Pikachu replied.

"...Do you wanna capture it so it doesn't call the flock?" Church asked.

Pikachu blinked a few times, "You know...I never really thought about that. Normally we just avoid it."

"All right. Seems we're gonna make some waters churn now," Church smirked before frowning a bit, "You know, I just thought of something. If I'm replacing Ash, who's replacing me?"

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><p>=Firing main cannon=<p>

"Oh no," Ash squeaked before the tank fired at him.

"Good job, Sheila!" Caboose beamed, "We killed Not-Church."

"This always happens when Church isn't here," Grif chuckled under his breath, looking over at Lopez who had gone with him this time instead of Simmons, "Remember the last guy this happened to?"

"Si. Ichigo Kurosaki tuvo la mejor reacción de todos ellos a la emisión equipo asesinato de Caboose, en mi opinión (Yes. Ichigo Kurosaki had the best reaction of them all to Caboose's team killing issue, in my opinion.)," Lopez replied, "Honestamente, fuera de los siete, sólo Ranma Saotome ha evitado la temida Kill Team Caboose no (Honestly, out of the Original Seven, only Ranma Saotome has avoided the dreaded Team Kill Caboose does)."

"You know, I'm glad that I actually took a vacation Loop to learn Spanish, so I can actually agree that Ichigo's reaction was the best of them all," Grif noted, "And it's only because Ranma is known for doing the impossible that he avoided that. Shame he couldn't avoid the Emp."

"Oh, mierda! Tu me entiendes? Abortar! Abortar(Oh shit! You understand me? Abort! Abort)!" Lopez fearfully freaked.

"I've been understanding you the last ten Loops," Grif rolled his eyes, "I don't really care what you say about me. But I do like some of the jabs you have on Sarge and the others. Especially the routine you did with Lopez Dos point O on Sarge." he stood up, "Come on, let's get outta here and then go find that new guy to explain the situation to him."

"¿Quieres convencerlo de que él es un fantasma real?"

"Nah. You remember what Ranma did to you and me that time, right?"

"No me lo recuerdes. Yo todavía activo en el medio de la noche para asegurarse de que no soy un pretzel nuevo (Don't remind me. I still activate in the middle of the night to make sure I'm not a pretzel again)."

"You just shot Ash, you team killing fucktard!" Tucker shouted at Caboose.

(to be continued)

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><p><strong>2.6 (GammaTron) Michael J. Caboose's first and only non-Read-Onlynon-Eiken Punishment Loop:**

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><p>Twilight's eyes snapped open. After she quickly settled her Loop memories, she realized that she was in a Punishment Loop. She just had to put that peanut butter on that alloy. Looking at a nearby mirror, she saw she was a human again. Soft whimpers outside earned her attention. Walking out, she saw a trembling figure in fetal position.<p>

"Excuse me, but are you okay?" Twilight asked.

"C..." the figure whimpered out, "Wh...Where is this? I...He's not replying!"

"What do you mean?"

"I...He's not responding to our signal...He's not around here, either..."

"Are you...Looping?" Twilight raised a brow.

"Not here...Not here...Not here..." the figure whimpered, holding his head, "The voices...they...the voices..."

"Voices?" Twilight raised a brow before the figure stopped and slowly got up.

The last thing Twilight remembered before she'd awake for Eiken was a frenzied scream of 'CHUUUUUUUUURRRRRCHHHH!-!-!-!', searing agony through her body, and then nothingness.

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><p><strong>Okay, everyone. Read and review and support the Infinite Loops by checking out the Wikia for it, its TV Tropes page, and even looking at the Spacebattle Forums for the Infinite Loops.<strong>

**2.1: Well, there goes that idea Grif had to avoid being shot at by Sarge.**

**2.2: Word of advice...Don't let Lopez meet Sakura Haruno alone. It won't be pretty nor will it end well.**

**2.3: Lopez's first Fused Loop and he's already made the Sorting Hat faint. I wonder what the Sorting Hat...*screams like a little girl and faints***

**2.6: And behold the terror of Caboose Syndrome.**


End file.
